For Thecia DeLap

National Wife Appreciation Day is celebrated on the third Sunday of September, offering a dedicated time for husbands to show appreciation for their wives. This unofficial holiday encourages spouses to express gratitude for their wives’ efforts and to acknowledge their role in the family. This year the holiday was this past week and here at 4 a.m. on a Saturday morning, I am compelled to appreciate my wife in my personal column.

It is also scriptural if you believe that your wife is a virtuous woman according to Proverbs 33, which I do. I especially love the 28^th verse: “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.”

So, what can I say to praise the love of my life? In one word, I would have to say that she is tenacious. To go on, she is driven, focused, kindhearted, extremely busy and intensely private. She has a small inner-circle and life has not always been kind and has made her cautious.

This spitfire grew up in an Italian family in Philadelphia with 6 siblings as she was a “somewhere in the middle” child. She was born to a father from Oklahoma and a mother from South Philly. She had the cliché’ Italian Aunt Soavis who owned an Italian restaurant and took her under her wing both in the kitchen and in life. From that time, cooking would be her passion. Everything revolved around family.

She left home at 18 and set out to prove that she could make it on her own. She began in the mortgage lending business and has stayed faithful to that calling all these years, now coming upon her 50^th anniversary in her incredible career.

She has become a success in the industry and the go-to person in the lending industry nation-wide. Although she has worked for many companies and faced many challenges, she remains on top of her game. It is an industry that can eat you alive and she has watched as many who have entered the hallowed halls of finance fail miserably.

She went from Philadelphia to Texas (where she owned her own horse ranch while working at a large bank originating mortgages) and then went on to spend most of her life living in Florida working for national mortgage banker, Vandyk Mortgage Corporation – a heavy hitter in the mortgage lending industry. When she started at Vandyk, she was starting fresh and wiping the slate clean. Now after 13 years with that company, she is among the leaders, manages her own branch and has amassed several awards. I’d have to create another room in our house for all of her accolades.

She has many times been among the leaders nationally in closed mortgages and in the last two months, she led the entire company in completed mortgage applications. She is a self-made woman who never attended college and has never needed anyone’s help. A kind of “Mary Tyler Moore” mold but I can assure you that she doesn’t throw any hats into the air. Although she wears many hats.

Her expertise is in the mortgage industry, writing the book on special programs for people who need help such as the Ship Program, Workforce Housing and many others are just a part of what she does. Realtors use her as she initiates a program called “co-marketing.” She is called upon to teach and give presentations all over the country and her teaching and mentoring skills makes those who work under her – better. Better because of her. She is not an easy teacher, however. She can be stern and strives for excellence and perfection – and though I’ve seen some try to go their own way, she has cornered the market on “No. This is how you do it.” Her reputation precedes her and I’d have to guess that with her track record she has helped with putting almost 20,000 people in their new homes.

We are now in our late 60s and our motto is, “Too busy to grow old.” I have taken pictures of her in pretty much all of our travels which have included Wyoming, Arizona, Colorado, Wisconsin, Illinois, Florida, Georgia, South Carolina, Virginia, North Carolina, Texas and I am pretty sure I am missing a few. She apologizes to anyone coming through our house as she is kind of embarrassed by my pictures of her that I have hung on my walls.

“It’s hard being married to a photographer,” she says. “He just comes out of nowhere with his camera and I have to be careful every time I turn a corner.” And she remains my favorite person to photograph.

I have inside eyes and am convinced that nobody works as hard as she does – working seven days a week and taking phone calls at all times of the day or night. I’ve listened to her with clients and Realtors and am amazed at the knowledge she is filled with and yes, some of the things she puts up with. She never gives up fighting for people to get a home, and in some occasions when they don’t qualify, she takes it personally.

Last week she was invited to do a seminar for Fathom Realty in Virginia. She offered a “Lunch and Learn” for those in attendance and then brought a presentation that just blew me away – and everyone there as well. The calls have not stopped coming from new Realtors that have clients who needed a credible lender and who can get them the best deal possible AND will be available WHENEVER they call.

When I met her, I was shooting pictures for National Geographic, was the editor of two newspapers and had been heavily invested in my Wyoming communities – planning on retiring out west. I tell people that she not only turned my head, but also turned my heart and the next thing I know we were married in Flagstaff, Arizona, (long story) and looking to live out our years in Florida. To be frankly honest… she saved my life. (Another long story)

As you all know now, I couldn’t stay away from story telling and I was pursued by Champion Media. I will never forget the day I told her I was offered a job in North Carolina and knowing it would be hard for her to leave Florida. After 21 years there, she put the needs of my heart above her own and she packed up our four-bedroom house in our gated community in Palm Beach where all the night life had wowed us and where we had millions of memories.

No. Wait. Literally – I started the job here… she packed up the house in Florida all by herself with our trusted dog Maxwell and soon we were on the road to North Carolina.

She is licensed to do business in 7 states and the move to North Carolina would place her into the middle of those states. The hub seemed perfect. So now, instead of working those states from Florida, she does it all out of her office in Elizabethtown, North Carolina.

When I took over, she had an idea to create a recipe column just for fun. “A hobby” is what she called it and then called it “Recipes from the editor’s wife…” We didn’t know how it would do, but after a few months, there were literally hundreds of positive comments.

Just last week she was in Raleigh at the North Carolina Press Association awards banquet and she received a third-place award for “Best light-column.” An “atta-girl” from peers and colleagues meant a lot to her.

I said earlier that she won’t throw her hat, but that she wears many hats. She sings with me, she is a sketch artist, she plays guitar and kazoo, photographer, philanthropist, she created our landscape and our interior design at our home in Clinton, she mows the lawn, she pulls weeds and cuts bushes, she does all the driving, she helps me haul bricks and mortar and dirt and sometimes at night she can’t shut her brain off. As a result, I get to hear all of our new adventures we’re about to embark on the next morning.

I have a feeling that if we retire one day – we won’t really retire. Her most spoken quote, “I’ve got so much to do.” I am glad I am the one she chooses to do it with.

She has sat with me while I was sick or in surgeries and even though I go through the procedure, she is more of a wreck than I am. She always finds a way to get me back to health and of course, on to new adventures. It’s funny how our house never seems to run out of projects when she can’t sleep at night.

My favorite story is how she let me sleep in one Sunday morning and when I got up… about 8 a.m. – she had half the kitchen painted and was en route to start on the upstairs bedrooms. Simply amazing.

I must end by using an old Ralph Kramden (AKA Jackie Gleason) term of endearment… “Baby – You’re the greatest.”